Testing times as Americans look for answers to North Korean crisis

As the United Nations meets to discuss how to handle the expanding North Korean crisis, an American film producer has announced the re-release of the 2004 film, Team America. Initially released under the comedy genre, recent events in North Korea have seen the film reclassified as documentary. It will be screened on the National Geographic channel towards the end of the year.

“As America faces a new and more dastardly enemy in the form of Kim Jong Il,” a spokesperson for the film distributor said. “They are looking for answers and an independent and objective assessment of how fantastically evil and deranged this man really is. Team America will provide these answers.”

The recent nuclear test conducted by the North Korean regime has led to an increased awareness of a country called North Korea within the United States. A recent CNN poll found that 85 per cent of Americans now believed that North Korea had a role in September 11 as compared to just 52 per cent last year.

President Bush has declared the nuclear test a vindication of his decision to invade Iraq. “We said there were WMDs and we found WMDs,” he told a press conference today. “They are in Korea. And the fact that they were in Korea shows the level of cooperation between Saddam and Kim Jong Il.”

“We need to redouble our efforts in Iraq and stay the course. We can’t let the threat of a nuclear holocaust distract us from the broader objective of training the Iraqi police force.”

Meanwhile, United Nations officials deliberate on how to handle the growing problem. Outgoing UN secretary-general Kofi Annan suggested they needed a something-for-food program but wasn’t sure what the North Koreans had that his son, Kojo, might want. “We’re just looking at the moment,” he said.

And, in other news, Hollywood sources have reported that Alec Baldwin has gone missing.